Changing Lines (Bellevue Bullies Book 5) Read online

  I nod quickly, sitting up so that my elbows hit my knees. I hold her hand, swirling my index finger along the palm of her hand. “I know I said you should stay here, but really, I only have to go for a little bit. A week at most. I gotta go sign papers and shit. Meet my coach, some of the players. I can even look at some houses while I’m there. The second she goes into labor, I’ll come back home—”

  She gives me a look. “This isn’t our home.”

  I lean my head into hers. “Claire, my home is where you are.”

  Her lips tip up again as she kisses my top lip. “Same here.”

  I don’t move away from her as I say, “Jace, Avery, and the kids will be close.”

  She shoots me a blank look. “They’re in Fort Lauderdale. We’ll be in Tampa.”

  “Close. Kinda. It will be good for the baby. You wanted him to grow up with family,” I remind her, and I’m rewarded with another small smile. She’s not happy, but at least she’s not upset anymore. “We’ll be sorta close to Nashville where the rest of the family is.”

  “Sorta.”

  I squeeze her hand in mine. “It’s going to be okay. We’ll win this like we do everything else.”

  She nods. “I’m scared what Tristan will say.”

  I can’t let her know that I am too. I lean back, pull out my phone, and dial Tristan’s number on speaker. When her raspy voice fills the line, Claire looks down at our hands.

  “Hey!”

  “Hey there. What are you up to?”

  She scoffs. “Currently doing squats to evict your kid. He’s stubborn, FYI.”

  “Great. He’ll take after his mom.” I tease, and Claire grins. “Listen, I’ve got some news.”

  “Good or bad?”

  I shrug with a small grimace. “In between?”

  “Oh, well, let me sit down, then,” she says, and since she is about to pop, I can literally hear her lowering herself onto the couch. “Tell Claire she isn’t missing anything with this crap. Being pregnant is for the birds.”

  The look on my wife’s face says otherwise. “You’re on speaker. She’s here.”

  “Oh,” Tristan says slowly. “So, this isn’t good.”

  “I don’t know. It’s a hit, I think.”

  “A hit?”

  “Yeah, like when a defensemen knocks you into the boards—”

  “Jude, you told me you were gonna send me Hockey for Dummies. I’m still waiting for my copy.”

  I grin as Claire laughs softly. “I’ll get it for you.”

  “Good, but get on with it. Rip it off like a Band-Aid.”

  Our gazes lock, and tears well up in Claire’s eyes once more. “I got traded to Tampa Bay. With their embarrassing loss to a wild card team after winning sixty-two regular season games, they need yours truly to switch things up.” I’m rambling. I know I am, but I’m terrified.

  “Traded? So, what? Like, you guys will move away?”

  “Yeah,” I answer, closing my eyes and pinching the bridge of my nose. “I’m not sure when, but before the start of the season.”

  She pauses. “Oh.”

  “Yeah, it’s sudden, I know.”

  “Yeah, it is.” She exhales heavily. “So, are you saying you don’t want the baby?”

  “No!” Claire shouts. “We want him. We so want him, Tristan. It’s not that at all.”

  “Oh. That’s good ’cause I really don’t know what I would have done.”

  She laughs, but Claire and I don’t. “But it means that unless you want to move with us, you wouldn’t be around the baby much. Unlike what we promised,” I say, and I’m nervous how she’s gonna react.

  “Oh.”

  “You can still visit,” Claire insists. “And you’ll still be Auntie T.”

  Tristan doesn’t answer right away, and I find that I’m holding my breath. “About that…” Tristan starts. “I don’t know… I don’t think I want him to know about me.”

  “What? No, that’s not right,” I say quickly. “He will know about you.”

  “But I don’t want him to resent me,” she says, and I can hear the emotion in her tone. “Like I hate my dad for running out on me.”

  “Yes, but you’re not running out on him. You’re giving him a better life than what you can give right now.” Claire looks at me, tears streaming down her face. “You’re giving us a gift we can never repay. Please let us tell him you did that for him and for us,” I stress.

  “We don’t want to lose contact with you, Tristan,” Claire says softly. “You’re a part of our family.”

  We’re met with silence, and my stomach turns over. I know, for someone else, this is the ideal situation, but I don’t want that for our baby. He’ll be ours, but he will know about Tristan. How she made our dreams come true. “I want him to know how strong, how smart, and how selfless you are, Tristan. Seriously. Don’t take that away from us. From him.”

  “I don’t want him to hate me,” she whispers.

  “He won’t. He’ll love you just as we do,” I promise. “Honestly.”

  “Okay,” she finally says after a moment. “I’m terrified, guys. This shit is legit crazy.”

  I laugh as Claire cries out. “Amen, sister, but we’re in this together.”

  “Thank God. I couldn’t do this without you two.”

  And we couldn’t without her.

  New Beginnings

  Jude

  “So, what did you think of everyone?”

  I walk through Claire’s and my potential kitchen before glancing back at my baby brother, Jace. On my shoulders is my nephew Jamieson. He looks like a carbon copy of Jace—nothing like Avery, but then, neither does Ashlyn. Avery jokes she was just a carrier, and it’s true, the Sinclair genes are strong. Dawson looks a lot like Baylor, but at the same time, Louis is Jayden made over. Even my twin nephews, Max and Ryder, look like Lucy. Thankfully, Benji got one kid out of the four. Charlotte is a girly little version of her dad. Thinking of everyone makes me miss them. Good thing we’ll all be together soon to celebrate my son.

  Wow. My son. I’m going to have a son.

  A grin covers my face as Jamieson holds on to my forehead, resting his head on mine. Every time I see the kid, he does this. “First impressions were good. They were excited to have me.”

  Jace looks through the pantry. When I told him I had been traded, he offered to drive up from Fort Lauderdale to help me look at places. Avery and Ashlyn are off in Nashville for some singing benefit, so it was perfect timing for Jace. He was bored, and Jamieson missed me. I missed the little bugger too. Maybe my brother a bit also.

  “J,” Jamieson says. “Why don’t you move in with us?”

  I laugh as I tap his hands on my head. He’s been calling me J since he could talk. Don’t know why, but I find it endearing. “I gotta live in Tampa, buddy. You can come visit Claire and me whenever you want.”

  I don’t have to see him to know he’s smiling. “And the new baby?”

  “And the new baby,” I say proudly.

  Jace glances back at me. No longer is he the young, snot-nosed kid; Jace is a man now. A family man. He loves his wife and kids and works his ass off to make them happy. While most hockey players post Instagrams of themselves doing lavish things, my brother is at swim lessons with Jamieson and violin concerts with Ashlyn. I didn’t know how much I would enjoy watching him grow. I’m proud of him. If I’m honest, I’m also a wee bit jealous. “Have you guys decided on a name? Avery and Lucy are getting pissed. They can’t get anything monogrammed without a name.”

  I laugh. I know this. They both text Claire daily. “We want to wait to see him first. Though, Claire likes Phillip River.”

  He smiles. “After two men who didn’t even raise you two. That says something about them.”

  “They’re the best.”

  He laughs hard. “Phillip punched you!”

  I grin. “I deserved it. I was a jackass.”

  “Ooh, J, you said ass.”

  I scoff. “So did you.�
�

  “And now you’re both grounded. Great parenting, Jude.”

  I shrug, which makes Jamieson giggle.

  Jace doesn’t seem to think we’re funny, but he also doesn’t seem very upset. “So, Tristan was good with the move?”

  “Yeah,” I say as I open the cabinets. Jamieson shuts them once we thoroughly look through them. “She doesn’t seem very concerned, really. I think she’s trying to ghost the situation. Us. Like, she thinks the baby is payment for all we did for her.”

  Jace shrugs. “Can’t blame her. She’s eighteen. She doesn’t want a kid, and not everyone is Avery and me.”

  I nod in agreement. They were young when Avery got pregnant with Ashlyn. I was honestly worried they wouldn’t make it, but they did—and then some. I remember apologizing for doubting them a while back. Jace didn’t care, though. He knew he and Avery were it. “I know, but I really would love for her to be in his life. She’s been a blessing.”

  “True, but maybe that’s the end of her blessing. Giving you guys this awesome gift, and then she goes and does her. Maybe it’s hard for her.”

  I didn’t think of it that way. “I hear you.”

  “What does Claire think?”

  “She feels the same way I do.”

  I open the back door to the large backyard. I can already see a swing set and a hockey goal. I can see our kid, running around and growing right before my eyes. The crazy thing is, I don’t just see him. I see another one. Two little boys, being crazy. Maybe Claire will find a surrogate for us. While I’m just fucking happy we’re getting one kid, I really want two. Maybe even three. Wow, I’m being greedy. Maybe she’ll be open to adoption since we’re adopting this one.

  “Good backyard.”

  “Yeah.”

  “I think you should let it play out,” Jace says then. I look over at him, a little confused. “The whole Tristan thing. If she wants to be involved, let her. If she wants to ghost, let her. She’s young, and it’s a lot at once. With everything she’s been through, she needs time.”

  I swallow hard. I didn’t think of it that way, but I know Claire is attached to her. I don’t think she would let Tristan ghost us. Since she was a troubled teen herself, Claire is all about helping kids with backgrounds like hers. She didn’t get pregnant back then, but she sure did make some bad choices before she went to live with her uncle, Phillip. I have no clue how a hockey player raised such an amazing woman, but Phillip gave me the woman I married, and I’ll forever be grateful to him.

  “I’ll talk to Claire.”

  “I think that’s for the best,” Jace agrees, and then he claps his hands together. “I don’t know about you, but I think this is the best house we’ve looked at.”

  I nod in agreement. “Claire loves it ’cause it’s one level.”

  “Exactly, and it’s also close to the rink.”

  “Yeah, this is where a lot of the guys said to buy.”

  “Cool. I think this is a good place to make a home.” I glance over at him as he smacks my back, lovingly. “I am really happy for you guys.”

  I wrap my arm around his neck, pulling him in like he’s still a baby. I lean my head into his, and Jamieson holds him too. It may suck that I’m uprooting our lives in Minnesota, but I’m excited for new beginnings. I’m stoked to be close to family, but most of all, I’m excited to become a dad.

  “How was the baby shower?”

  On the other end of my FaceTime, Claire is packing away the gifts she received today. We finished the nursery decoration two weeks ago, but you couldn’t tell now. It’s completely bare, as is most of the Minnesota house. Claire gets things done, and when it’s time to move, she’s ready. Even working so hard getting everything completed, she still looks absolutely perfect. Her hair is in wide curls, pinned to one side. She’s wearing a blue maxi dress that hugs her body, though I only know that because I saw the pictures on Instagram.

  Clare had her baby shower with the Wild team wives. She had been excited for today, hoping to get the missing things we needed. By the looks of it, she may have, but she’s also been crying. I understand, though. She’s friends with these women, and they’ve been girlfriends for over five years now.

  “It was really nice,” she says sadly. “Everyone is sad I’m leaving, but they’re excited for us.”

  I figured. “Did you get everything we needed?”

  She nods. “Yeah, they bought out our registry, which is awesome, but we still need a stroller.”

  “I think my mom is getting that.”

  “Awesome,” she says as she packs some clothes. “He won’t need clothes until he’s four.”

  I smile. “I’m sure you’ll still buy stuff.”

  “Probably,” she jokes. “Have you heard about the house?”

  “Not yet. The real estate agent said should be tomorrow.”

  “Nice.” She leans back, crossing her legs as she looks down at the phone. “Has Jamieson changed a lot?”

  “Yeah,” I laugh. “He’s huge, with big ole green eyes like Jace. He also uses the word ‘perplexed’ a lot. It’s funny. He’s like ‘Dad, you’re perplexing me.’ Apparently, Avery has one of those word-a-days or something, and he takes it seriously.”

  She grins. “Did you see Ashlyn?”

  “No, she was off at some benefit with Avery in Nashville. Also, from what my mom is saying, she and River are gonna come and help us when we move.”

  She lets out a long breath. “Reese and Phillip offered too.”

  “Hell, might as well have everyone come and help. I’m sure we’ll be overwhelmed.”

  “Yeah,” she agrees with a small smile. “I have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow.”

  “Fertility or other?”

  “Fertility.”

  I lick my lips as I lie back in the bed, feeling a lot guilty. “I’m sorry I’ll miss it.”

  She waves me off. “It’s okay. You have that luncheon, right?”

  “Yeah, but text me anyway and tell me what they say.”

  She smiles grimly. “Maybe they’ll say I’m pregnant.”

  I grin at her. “Well, that would be the icing on the cake.”

  She nods, and I know she has a lot going on in her head. She’s done anything and everything to get pregnant. She gave up carbohydrates on her doctor’s orders and also upped her fat intake to change things up. It’s something new that our doctor has observed helps women get pregnant. It would be awesome if it worked.

  “Yeah, I think so too.” Claire leans on her knees, her long hair falling along her shoulders. “So, you still want to try?”

  “Um, baby,” I say eagerly, “I want to have sex with you, a lot.”

  She snorts and I smile. “Good to know.”

  “And if it happens, it does.”

  “And if it doesn’t?”

  Our eyes meet as she folds a little jacket, and I say, “We’ll keep looking at surrogates, or maybe look into adopting another.”

  Her eyes glaze over. “So, you want more kids?”

  “I mean, don’t get me wrong. I don’t know shit about parenting, but I think we’re going to do okay. Shit, Jace could barely care for himself, and he’s got two kids and a wife. He’s actually doing great, too.”

  She laughs. “Leave him be. He has always been a good guy.”

  “Spoiled.”

  She rolls her eyes. “All of you were.”

  She isn’t wrong. We had money growing up, but when my dad left us for his new wife, Mom struggled a little bit. We’re not close to my dad, and I think we’re all better off that way. Especially since we have River. He’s a great stepdad. A great man.

  “I am having lunch with Tristan after my appointment.”

  I nod. “Let me know how that goes too. Have you talked to her since I left?”

  “We talk every day,” she says simply. “She’s in pain, hates being pregnant. But her due date is Friday, and they think she might go earlier.”

  “Hopefully she can wait until I get ho
me.”

  “I hope so,” she says, optimistic but excited.

  I clear my throat. “So, I think you should give her an out.”

  Her eyes snap back to mine. “What?”

  “Tristan. I was talking to Jace, and he thinks that if she wants an out, we should give it to her. It’s been a lot, Claire. With her leaving that douchebag and then being pregnant, I think she needs to let this part of her life go.”

  Claire doesn’t seem to agree. She has that furrow in her brow. “But don’t we want the baby to know her?”

  I shrug. “What if he doesn’t? Would it be so bad?”

  She blinks as tears gather in her eyes. “I don’t know.”

  “We’re still his parents, no matter what we decide, but I think we should respect her.”

  She doesn’t look at me; she keeps folding the same jacket. “I’ll talk to her tomorrow.”

  At least she’s willing. “Let me know.”

  “I will.” But she looks sad. I hate that. I want to wrap my arms around her, smother her with kisses. Hell, try to make a baby. Over and over again. A grin fills my face as I drink in the elegant image that is my wife.

  “Hey, gorgeous,” I say, and when she looks up, she’s grinning. “I love you. So damn much, and I’m sorry you’re having to pack without me.”

  She shrugs, though her grin stays intact. “Part of this hockey wife gig.”

  “You’re the best hockey wife ever.”

  She beams. “Because I love the best hockey-playing man ever.”

  And damn if I’m not one lucky sonofabitch.

  The Next Hit

  Claire

  I hate how nervous I get when I come to our fertility center.

  My skin always breaks out in gooseflesh, and my heart never goes below a hundred and twenty beats per minute. According to my Fitbit, I’m working out when I come here. I don’t know if it’s nerves that get me or if it’s just pure fear. Maybe both? I hate letting Jude down. Hell, I hate letting myself down. I’m not used to losing. I’ve worked very hard my whole life. I somehow stayed alive when my mom couldn’t care for me, and I stayed untouched by the nasty men she would bring home. I survived. When Phillip got custody of me, I didn’t think he could care for me. He was a single hockey player, he liked the fast life, and he sure as hell didn’t want to care for a kid. He proved me wrong, though. He has been my rock since I came to him. He gave me the tools I needed to succeed, and I used them to make a great life. I made some bad decisions here and there and felt as if I failed or let someone down, but it never felt like this.